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Favorite this joke Sister Grace at the convent opened a letter from home and found a $100 bill from her parents. She smiled at the gesture. As she read the letter by the window, she noticed a shabbily-dressed stranger leaning against the lamp post below.
Quickly, she wrote, "Don't despair. Sister Grace" on a piece of paper, wrapped the $100 bill in it, and tossed it out the window. The stranger picked it up and read the note. He tipped his hat to Sister Grace and hurried away.
The next day, Sister Grace was told that a man was asking to see her. She went down and found the stranger waiting. Without a word, he handed her a huge wad of $100 bills.
"What's this?" she asked.
"That's your $8,000, sister," he replied. "'Don't Despair' paid 80-to-1."
How does a woman turn a man into a millionaire?
She marries a billionaire.
It was a long season for my son's baseball team with a 0-11 record. All of the players were new and prone to errors, strikeouts and poor pitching.
One Friday afternoon my son came crashing through the door and announced his team had played the best game of the year. "What did you win by?" I asked.
He replied, "Oh, we were beat 32 to 2, but it's the first game where no one made an error!"
Success comes in baby steps.
"Darn!" the man said to his friend while weighing himself at the local drug store scale. "I started on a new diet but the scale says I'm heavier than I was before."
Turning to his friend, he said, "Here, hold my jacket." The scale still indicated that he had not lost any weight.
"OK," he said to his friend. "Hold my Twinkies."
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