Best Jokes

A snake slithered into a bar and asked the bartender for a drink. “I’m sorry,” said the bartender, “but I can’t serve you.”

“Why not?” asked the snake.

“Because you can’t hold your drink.”

As my sister relaxed on the couch, her head comfortably leaning against the crook of her husband’s arm, her cell phone beeped.

She looked at her phone. It was a text message from her husband.

The message: "Please Move."

On a billboard ad for a safe company...

"If your stuff is stolen, it’s not our vault!"

Why did Novak Djokovic pay for his flight to Australia with a Mastercard?

Because his Visa didn’t work.