Latest Jokes

After a tiring day at work, a husband was able to sneak out an hour early. He just wanted to get home and lie down in bed next to his wife.

He gets home and slides into bed next to his sleeping wife. But then he hears a sound coming from underneath. He puts his hand under the bed, expecting to feel the wet nose or tongue of his dog Buddy. He asks, "Is that you, Buddy?"

His hand gets licked and then he hears, "Yes, it's me, Buddy."

Grade school children were asked the question, "Why did your mom marry your dad?"

These are some responses:

1. She got too old to do anything else with him.
2. My grandma says that mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
3. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world, and Mom eats a lot!

A bank clerk is talking with her colleague. "I think now-a-days my beauty has been decreasing."

"Why do you think that?" asked the colleague.

"The men who are withdrawing cash at my counter are actually counting their money."

What word starts with E, ends with E, and has only one letter in it?

Envelope.