Latest Jokes

A 10-year-old child was having a conversation with their grandmother while eating breakfast...

Child: "Nanna, I'm a chubby old man."

Grandmother: "What did you say?"

Child: "I'm a chubby old man."

Grandmother: "Now why would you say something like that?"

Child: "Well, everybody says I look just like my daddy."

One of my job responsibilities is to input employee self-evaluations.

There was a junior manager's self-evaluation, which said in part, "I have been on the job for three months, and I finally feel as if I've accomplished something."

I made one mistake, however. I replaced the word 'job' with 'John'.

A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss were on their way to a lunch meeting. In the cab they found a lamp. The boss rubbed it and a genie appeared.

"I'll grant you one wish each," the genie said.

Grabbing the lamp from his boss, the eager senior manager shouted, "I want to be on a fast boat in the Bahamas with no worries." And poof, he was gone.

The junior manager couldn't keep quiet. He shouted, "I want to be in Miami, with beautiful girls, and food, and cocktails." And poof, he was gone.

Finally, it was the boss's' turn. "I want those idiots back in the office after lunch."

Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end.

At the last house a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter. Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger coworker to a foot race down the alley back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one.

As they came running up to the truck, they realized the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong.

Gasping for breath, she replied, "When I see two gas men running as hard as you two were, I figured I'd better run too!"