Latest Jokes

What did the conductor say when asked to play "The Messiah"?

"I don't think my orchestra can Handel it."

A man went to the hardware store and asked for nails.

"How long do you want them?" asked the salesman.

"Oh," said the customer, "I was rather hoping to keep them."

While attending a marriage seminar dealing with communication, Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor, "It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other."

He addressed the men, "Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?"

Tom, smiling but looking a little nervous, leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's self-rising flour, right?"