Latest Jokes

1 votes
 

To stop King Kong's rampage, the U.S. Army got their top strategists together and came up with a terrific plan.

They built a massive catapult engine, loaded a 1966 Volkswagen in it, and hurled the vehicle directly at the side of the giant ape's head.

In other words, they put a bug in his ear.

1 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "Alan Valentine" |
1 votes

In 1996, Peter was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from college. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.

He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenage son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1996, Peter couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same elephant.

1 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "GDL" |
0 votes
 

Wife: John, what becomes of a ballplayer when his eyesight starts to fail?

John: They make him an umpire.

0 votes

CATEGORY Sport Jokes
posted by "iqannnylirod" |
0 votes
rating rating rating rating rating
 

People who think that time heals everything have obviously never tried waiting it out in a doctor's waiting room!

0 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "iqannnylirod" |