Latest Jokes

Store owner: "Thank you for your patronage. I wish I had twenty customers like you."

Customer: "Gosh, it's nice to hear that, but I'm kind of surprised. You know that I argue every bill and always pay late."

Store owner: "I'd still like twenty customers like you. The problem is, I have two hundred customers like you."

Mr. Peterson, a tourist from Toronto, arrived in Barbados. In an airport taxi cab, Peterson asked the driver, "Say, is this really a healthful place?"

"It sure is," the cabby replied. "When I arrived here I couldn't say one word. I had hardly any hair on my head. I didn't have the strength to walk across a room, and I had to be lifted out of bed."

"That's wonderful!" said the tourist, "How long have you been here?"

"I was born here."

A man went to his doctor to go over his blood work results. As soon as he entered the doctor's office, the doctor said to him, "I just looked at your results. You are lucky that you come to see me early enough..."

The man became very nervous and asked, "What's wrong with my blood work?"

"Oh nothing! Just that I'll be leaving my office early today," replied the doctor.

A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his head, sits down and orders a drink.

Bartender serves the pirate his drink, and asks about the paper towel.

The pirate smiles and says, "That be the bounty on me head!"