Latest Jokes

If Mississippi wears her New Jersey, what does Delaware?

I dunno, Al-ask-a.

A man walks into a bar. He gets very drunk and asks the bartender where the restroom is.

The bartender explains it's the third door to the right, but the man goes into the third door to the left. He finds a large golden toilet. The man takes a big poop in it and leaves.

He continues to return to drink there every week, and every time he goes to poop in that golden toilet.

One day he finds the golden toilet is gone, so he asks the bartender about it.

The bartender exclaims, "So you're the one who's been pooping in my tuba!"

What is the favorite pastime for Retired Lawyers?

Ambulance chasing!

----- Old Habits Die Hard-----

To get a massive and immediate attention from a buyer, the Vacuum Cleaner salesman opens a bag of horse manure and spreads it all over the carpet.

Then he says to the possible buyer with confidence, "Mrs. if this vacuum cleaner can't clean all that manure I will eat the rest!"

The lady asks, "Do you want ketchup with that?"

Why the salesman ask?

"Because we just moved in and we don't have electricity yet!"