Boy: Ah, finally, I've waited so long.
Girl: You want me to leave?
Boy: No. I dare to not even think about it.
Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Of course. Lots!
Girl: Have you ever cheated on me?
Boy: No! Why are you asking me?
Girl: Will you kiss me?
Boy: Every time I get the chance!
Girl: Will you ever hit me?
Boy: Are you crazy? Of course not!
Girl: Can I trust you?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Darling?
Now Read it Backwards!
One Sunday after church Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about.
Her daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilts." Needless to say, Mom was perplexed.
Later in the day, the Pastor stopped by for tea. Mom asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about.
He said, "Be not afraid, Thy comforter is coming."
My wife came home with four cases of beer, three boxes of wine, two bottles of whiskey and two loaves of bread.
"Are we expecting guests?" I asked.
"No," she replied.
"Then why did you buy so much bread?"
One evening I was walking through a rather seedy section of town, when a bum walked up to me and asked me for two dollars.
First I asked him, "Will you buy booze?"
The bum replied, "No."
Then I asked, "Will you gamble it away?"
The bum said, "No."
After giving the bum the two dollars that he had asked for, I asked the bum, "Now, will you come home with me, so that my wife can see what happens to a man who doesn't drink or gamble?"