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Favorite this joke I walked into a coffee shop on Halloween to find the woman behind the counter with a bunch of sponges pinned to her uniform.
"I'm assuming this is a costume, but just what are you supposed to be?" I asked.
The waitress responded proudly, "I'm self-absorbed."
I asked my phone, "Siri, why am I so bad with women?"
She said, "I'm Alexa you moron."
So I was in the chemist lab and I said to the assistant, “What gets rid of germs?”
She said, "Ammonia cleaner."
I said, "Oh sorry, I thought you worked here...”
Iamonthemoonandthereisnowheretogetabeer.
Thereisnospacebar.
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