Customer: "How much are these tomatoes?"
Owner: "Ninety-nine cents a pound."
Customer: "What? The stand down the road only charges seventy-nine cents a pound!"
Owner: "Then why don't you shop there?"
Customer: "They don't have any today."
Owner: "Well, when I don't have any I charge seventy-nine cents, too!"
A girl says to a salesman, "I'm not sure if I should buy a sweatshirt or a windbreaker."
He says, "Well, that depends. Are you gonna sweat, or are you gonna break wind?"
I have a great idea to make money!
Start a transportation service hauling folks to the marijuana dispensaries...
I call it, the Canna-Bus!
What happened when the butcher backed into his meat grinder?
He got behind in his work.