A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, "Your first job will be to sweep out the store."
"But I'm a college graduate," the young man replied indignantly.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know that," said the manager. "Here, give me the broom, I'll show you how."
Management vs. Solutions...
After moving into our new office space, I was given the job of completing an Occupational Health and Safety report about the building. I discovered that the building had been built with no fire exit!
If a fire starts at the entrance, the only way out would be to smash through the manager's office window. So I put these comments down and submitted my report to the manager before it got sent to head office.
In all seriousness, he added the following comment to the head office about smashing the window: "Please confirm that this is an acceptable option by returning your approval."
When the wise company president learned that his employees were tanking up on no-trace vodka martinis during their lunch hours, he issued the following memo:
To all employees: If you must drink during you lunch hours, please drink whiskey. It is better for our customers to know you're drunk than to think you're stupid.
An insurance broker, living in Florida, loves ocean fishing and decided to take his boat out for a troll. That morning, he was drifting about ten miles offshore and received a business call on his cell phone.
Suddenly, his rod bent double and the reel screamed as line poured off the spool. This salesman was master of the situation.
"Pardon me," he told his customer calmly. "I have a call on another line."