doctor jokes

" Doctor I keep stealing things"
" Take these tablets; if that doesn't work get me a flat screen TV."

Q: Why did the T-rex go to the doctor?
A: Because he had a Dino-sore!

A cannibal visited the witch doctor with a serious skin rash.
The doctor gave him a small pot of grease to rub on.
He returned next week completely cured. " Wonderful stuff what is it" he said
"My best friend died . I boiled him in a pot for six days then skimmed the grease off" he replied.
" What do you call it?" Said the cannibal.
" Pal o' mine lotion" replied the witch doctor.

A group of doctors were out duck hunting, when a large bird flew overhead. The family doctor raised his gun to shoot, but then lowered his gun saying, "I am not sure that is a duck."

The Psychiatrist raised his gun, but then lowered it again saying, “I know it's a duck, but I'm not sure that it knows it's a duck."

The surgeon raises his gun and blasts the bird out of the sky. He turns to the pathologist and says, "Go see if that was a duck."