Best Jokes

Mable your granny made the most perfect pie crust. Every line along the crust was equal and just perfect. How did she ever do it?

Well Alice, all I know for sure is when she made the final touches around the edge of her pie crust she took her teeth out to make the edge even.

Joe, I hear your are celebrating your 50th anniversary, any special plans for the wife?

Yes, I took her to Hawaii for our 25th and I thought I would go back and get her to celebrate the 50th.

One day God was looking down at Earth and saw all the rascally behavior that was going on. He decided to send an angel down to Earth to check things out.

When the angel returned, he told God, "Yes, it is bad on Earth; 95% are misbehaving and only 5% are not." God thought for a moment and said, "Maybe I had better send down another angel for a second opinion."

When that angel returned, he went to God and said, "Yes, it's absolutely true. The Earth is in a ravaging decline! 95% are misbehaving and only 5% are being good."

God was not pleased. So He decided to send an email to the 5% that were good, because he wanted to encourage them. Give them a little something to help them keep going.

Do you know what the E-mail said?

Just wondering.......I didn't get one either!

Our local ice cream store likes to be creative with new names for flavors, but i think they have gone to far with their latest... Chocolate Chip Chipotle.