Best Jokes

Returning to West Point late one night, Colonel Schultz and his wife were challenged by the sentry at the gate.
“Halt and identify yourself!”
“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!” declared the startled woman.
The sentry stepped aside. “Advance, Holy Family, to be recognized.”

After telling the customs agent he had nothing in his bags but clothing, Mark was alarmed when the official decided to open them up and check. In the very first one she opened, cushioned between his socks was a bottle of cognac.
“Nothing to declare but clothing, huh?”
“Right,” Mark extemporized. “That, madam, is my nightcap.”

A man goes to his doctor and says " Hi doc, remember me "?
' No, but what can I do for you? "
"You know doc, I came to you two years ago. You said I had pneumonia, gave me some medicine and advised me to not to have a bath "
" So? "
" Well I'm fine now, thanks. I just wanted to know, can I have a bath now?"

Q. What does a cow make when the sun comes out?
A. A shadow