Latest Jokes

It was 6 p.m., and I was about to leave the coin laundry where I was employed. My boss called me over and asked if I would mind dropping off someone's laundry on my way home. "It's for my cousin," she said, "who is eight months pregnant and can't get out much anymore."

I cheerfully agreed and, driving to the address, knocked at the door. A little girl, the sister-to-be, answered.

"Hi, there," I said with a big smile. "Is your mommy home?" Holding up the white bundle of clothes, I explained, "I have a delivery for her."

The child's mouth dropped, and her eyes went wide. "Mom!" she shrieked, "come quick! It's the stork!"

You know you are having a bad day when your twin sister forgets your birthday.

Q: What is the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?

A: One says "See you later" and the other says "In a while".

Always borrow money from a pessimist...

...they never expect it back!