Latest Jokes

59 years ago I got my first picture taken with Santa, just found out it was with Grandma.

My neighbor and I were talking, when he brought up the fact they were going to travel abroad over the holidays to Beijing, China.

I said, "Oh that's nice, after the first of the year we too are going to travel."

He said, "Oh where are you all going?"

I said, "Well we are excited, were going to Walmart to see all the new Chinese products."

A little boy sat fascinated, watching as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. "Why do you do that, mommy?" he asked.

"To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue.

"What's the matter?" asked Little Johnny. "Giving up?"

Two blondes were walking down the road and the first blonde said, "Look at that dog with one eye!"

The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says, "Where?"