Latest Jokes

Two brothers are terrible trouble makers. They are always breaking things, stealing things, lying, and making all kinds of general trouble. The parents have tried everything to get the boys to change, to no avail.

Out of options, they ask their pastor if he can help. He says he will talk to the boys, but only one at a time. The parents drop off the youngest and go home, promising to return to get him soon. The boy sits in a chair across from the pastor's desk and they just look at each other.

Finally, the Pastor says, "Where is God?" The boy just sits there and doesn't answer. The pastor begins to look stern and loudly says, "Where is God?"
The little boy shifts in his seat, but still doesn't answer.

The pastor is starting to get angry at the boy's refusal to converse and practically shouts "Where is God?"

To the pastor's surprise, the little boy jumps up out of his chair and runs out of the office. The boy leaves the church and runs all the way home, up the stairs and into his brother's room. He shuts the door and pants, "We're in BIG TROUBLE. God's missing and they think we did it!"

I've always been confused between the definition of right and wrong.

When I was a kid my parents would say, "Boy, you have done wrong."

I'd say, "Is that right?"

They would say, "Yes."

Well the last time I Tweeted, I was disqualified because Twitter said it was a chirp!

My cute little Granddaughter asks me, "Grandpa can I have $10 please?"

I said, "Well sure hun what's it for?"

She says, "Well you old tightwad every time I ask for a twenty spot you say No!!!"