Latest Jokes

A farmer has three sons. One day, his oldest boy comes to him and pleads with him that he is graduating from school and would really like to get a car. His father says, "Son, come with me." He takes him to the barn and points to the farm tractor and says, "That tractor is
needed here on the farm and I promise that as soon as it's paid for, we'll get you a car."

The boy was not too happy but he did understand that
situation and said, "Okay, Dad."

A week later, his second son (10 years old) approaches him wanting a new two-wheel bicycle. Well, he gets the same excuse ... "as soon as that tractor is paid for..."

Shortly, a few days later, son no. 3, his youngest, comes
bugging him for a tricycle. Again, 'ol Dad gives him the lecture about the tractor being paid for first.

While leaving the barn, the young boy, more than a little
disgusted with the whole thing, sees a rooster mating with one of the hens and promptly goes over and kicks the rooster off the hens back, mumbling to himself the whole time.

His dad says, "Son, why on earth would you do something like that? He didn't do anything to you to
deserve that!"

The little boy looks Dad right square in the eye and says,
"Hey, nobody rides anything around here until that damn tractor is paid for.

Two girlfriends were speeding down the highway at well over 90 mph.

"Hey," asked the brunette at the wheel "Any cops following us?"

The blonde turned around and had a long look at the road behind them.

"Yeah, looks like it"

Are his flashers on?"

The blonde turned around again......

"Yup.... nope.... yup.... nope.... yup.... nope.... yup....."

Man and wife driving through the countryside come across a herd of goats.

Wife to hubby whilst pointing at the goat's: Your relatives!

Hubby to wife: Yes they are....from my wife's side.

Heard about the two blondes who were found starving and freezing to death at the drive inn?

They thought closed for winter was a movie.