Latest Jokes
Favorite this joke I just killed a huge spider running across the floor with my shoe.
I don't care how big the spider is, no one steals my shoe!
Although we were being married in New Hampshire, I wanted to add a touch of my home state, Kansas, to the wedding.
My fiancee, explaining this to a friend, said that we were planning to have wheat rather than rice thrown after the ceremony.
Our friend thought for a moment. Then he said solemnly, "It's a good thing she's not from Idaho."
A stranded motorist knocked on the door of an inn named “George and the Dragon.”
“Could you spare a poor stranded motorist a bite to eat?” he asked the woman who answered the door.
“No!” she screamed, slamming the door.
A few seconds later he knocked again. The same woman answered the door.
“Could I please have a bite to eat?” he asked again.
“Get out, you good-for-nothing!” shouted the woman. “And don’t you ever come back!”
After a few minutes there's another knock at the door. The woman comes to the door.
“Pardon,” said the motorist, “but could I have a few words with George this time?”
Passenger: What good is your timetable, the trains are never on time!
Conductor: And how would you know they were late if it wasn’t for the timetable?
Free Daily Joke