family jokes

George, who had a wife and 8 children, needed to move because his rental agreement was terminated by the owner who wanted to reoccupy the home. But he was having a lot of difficulty finding a new house. When he said he had 8 children, no one would rent a home to him because they felt that the children would destroy the place. He couldn't say he had no children, because he didn't believe in lying.

So, he sent his wife for a walk to the cemetery with 7 of their kids. He took the remaining one with him to see rental homes with the real estate agent. He loved one of the homes and the price was right. The agent asked, "How many children do you have?"

He answered, "Eight."

The agent asked, "Where are the others?"

George, looked the agent right in the eye, and answered, "They're at the cemetery with their mother."

A very good friend of mine is a single mother of four young beautiful daughters. Over the past couple of months, each one of her children have asked what it's like to be a mommy. She kept telling them when the time is right, she would explain it in such a way that all of them could understand.

So one early morning, at about 3am, she decided to wake all of them up and gather them in her bedroom while they were still half asleep for a little chat. "Remember how all of you asked what it's like to be a mommy?" she says.

"Yes mommy," says the oldest one, "but it's sooo early."

"That's right sweetie," says the mother, "but I can't find my teddy bear, I have an itch on my back that I can't scratch, and where's Fluffy? Plus I'm thirsty and I want a glass of water, my socks keep falling off my feet and I'm sooo cold. Could you please get me another blanket and tuck me in and tell me another story?"

After a brief pause, she adds, "Okay then...do all of you understand now?"