sport jokes
Favorite this joke Man: ”They’ll be changing the metric system soon!”
Boy: ”Uh, what’s that?”
Man: ”They’ll be changing feet to meters!
Boy: ”You mean, we'll be playing meterball?”
Luke: I remember the time I played against Yale in football. What a game it was."
Mark: "What position did you play?"
Luke: "In the first game I was left...."
Mark: "End?"
Luke: "Left out. In the second half I was back...."
Mark: "You were back in?"
Luke: "No, way back."
I've seen plenty of batting slumps," the manager told one of his coaches. "But I've never had a whole lineup in a slump before."
The team had lost 10 of its last 20 games, scoring only eight runs during that whole stretch. The best they'd done was four hits in a game.
"We have to try something different," the manager said to his batting coach.
"What do you have in mind?" the batting coach asked warily.
"I'm going into the batting cage myself," the manager said.
The coach tried to talk him out of it. But the manager was desperate, willing to try anything.
With the whole team watching, the coach swung at the first pitch and missed. He missed the second pitch. Ditto the third, fourth, and fifth. On the sixth pitch, he just nicked the ball, which dribbled back to the pitcher's mound.
The manager slammed his bat to the ground, turned around, and stared at his players. "That's how you guys look at the plate!" he yelled. "Now get up there and HIT the ball!"
Overheard at the race track...
Bettor: “I’m betting on a horse that is 20 to 1 and I can’t lose.
Friend: “What do you mean 'you can’t lose’?”
Bettor: “I can’t lose, the horse is starting at 20 to 1 and the race doesn’t start till 1.”
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