Best Jokes

What's the difference between a duck and George Washington?

One has a bill on their face and the other has their face on a bill.

A fisherman returned to shore with a giant marlin that was bigger and heavier than he. On the way to the cleaning shed, he ran into a second fisherman who had a stringer with a dozen baby minnows.

The second fisherman looked at the marlin, turned to the first fisherman and said, "Only caught one, eh?"

"Dad," I said to my father on Father's Day, "it's Father's Day today! As a gift, I want to take you and mom out for a great day!"

"Thank you, my son," said my father, taking a deep draw from his cigarette. "If you really want to get me a gift, just take your mom out for the whole day."

A famous Viking explorer returned home from a voyage and found his name missing from the town register.

His wife insisted on complaining to the local civic official, who apologized profusely saying, "I must have taken Leif off my census."