Best Jokes

The bride was anything but a tidy housekeeper. It didn't bother her much until one evening when her husband called from the hall, somewhat dismayed, "Honey, what happened to the dust on this table? I had a phone number written on it."

John: What did the bug say to the windshield when he crashed into it?

Fred: I don't know. what?

John: That's me all over you! And do you know what the windshield said to the bug?

Fred: I don't know.

John: Bet you don't have the guts to do that again! Okay, do you know what was the last thing that went through the bugs mind when he hit the windshield?

Fred: No, but I bet it's good.

John: His rear end.

A 106-year-old cowboy in Texas recently passed away. He was asked on his last birthday earlier this year his secret to longevity.

He told them that for the past 50 years he had sprinkled a little gunpowder on his cereal each morning.

He left behind 8 children, 21 grandchildren, 32 great-grandchildren, and a 15-foot hole in the crematorium.

There is no right way to do the wrong thing...

But there is definitely a wrong way to do the right thing!