The prospective father-in-law asked, "Young man, can you support a family?"
The surprised groom-to-be replied, "Well, no, I was just planning to support your daughter. The rest of you are going to have to fend for yourselves."
Sometimes you're the bug...
More often than not, you're the windshield.
Don't worry about the world ending today...
It's already tomorrow in Australia.
The Sunday School teacher looked at the little boy's drawing of the manger scene. A large dog was among the animals.
The teacher looked puzzled.
"Oh," said the child, "That's a German Shepherd."