Best Jokes

A woman shipped an expensive gift to her best friend. A few days later her best friend replied with a thank you card but forgot to write something on the inside.

When her friend brought this to her attention, to escape embarrassment she said, "When I saw how much you spent on that gift... I WAS SPEECHLESS!"

Patient: "My problem is that I keep stealing things when I go shopping. Can you give me something for it?"

Doctor: "Try this medicine. If it doesn't work, come back to see me, and bring me a new video camera too."

Why did Santa go to a Kanye West concert?

He wanted to improve his wrapping skills!

A little boy walks into a phone store and right away sees the new Samsung Galaxy phone that just came out.

He walks up to the register and the worker asks, "What can I help you with, young man?"

The little boy asks, "Are you the Guardian of the Galaxies?"