Best Jokes

Two ladies are walking to their local County Fair, when it starts to rain. One says to the other, "Put your umbrella up, it's raining."

"I can't," says the other, "it's got holes in it."

"Holes in it?" the first lady asks. "Why did you bring it with you?"

The response, "I didn't think it would rain."

Last year i was approved to join a location procrastination club...

We have not met yet.

I went to a new bank in town to open a joint account. At one point in the application they ask for the second name on the account.

Apparently the bank did not like my response. I wrote down, 'Anyone who has a lot of money.'

Two guys sitting in a football stadium waiting for the game to start.

One turns to the other and says, “I hope the rain keeps up!”

“Oh, why?”

“So it doesn’t come down!”