Best Jokes

My friend seemed really down as we were having an after work visit to the local bar. After a few beers he finally shared his story. "I finally snapped. Last night while I was going over the bills, I discovered how much money my wife squanders and I hit the roof. I stormed into the bedroom and gave her a lecture on economy and thrift.”

“Did it help?”

“I’ll say. Tomorrow we’re selling my boat and sailing equipment.”

Just before Santa took off for his annual around the world trip, Mrs. Claus looked out the window and commented...

"It looks like rain-dear!"

If your name is on the building, you’re rich...

If your name is on your desk, you’re middle-class...

If your name is on your shirt, you’re neither of the first two!

When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body.

Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts!