Best Jokes

Ask not what staying home on the couch can do for you...

But what staying home on the couch can do for your country!

Everyone told Sam not to sing...

But Samsung anyway.

They decided that they wanted to reveal the gender of the baby at our family reunion of about 40 people.

That night, after just finishing up a BBQ, my brother and his wife stand up and announce to the family that they are going to have a little baby girl. Everyone starts cheering, naturally and once the cheers die down a little I shout out, “Do you have a name for the baby yet?”

My brother replies, “Yeah. Landa Noelle.”

Everyone starts to “Ooohhh” and “Ahhhh” and proclaim how pretty of a name it is.

Then after a moment I shout, “How the heck are you supposed to spell Landa with no L?”

I exercised once, but found I was allergic to it.

My skin got flushed and my heart raced, I got sweaty and short of breath...

It's too dangerous.