Best Jokes

Kid: Why is some of your hair white dad?

Dad: Every time you make me unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.

Kid: Now I understand why grandpa’s hair is all white!

Little Johnny: "Why does it rain, dad?"

Father: "To make the flowers grow and the grass and the trees."

Little Johnny: "So why does it rain on the sidewalk?"

My daughter had absentmindedly left her sneakers on our kitchen table. "That’s disgusting," my husband grumbled. "Doesn’t she realize we eat off that table?"

Then he went out back to work on the car. I cleaned the table and left to do my grocery shopping.

When I came home I couldn’t set my bags down anywhere. Sitting in the middle of the kitchen table was a car muffler.

The teacher asked Little Johnny if he knew his numbers.

“Yes,” he said. “My dad taught me.”

“Good. So what comes after eight?”

“Nine,” answered Little Johnny.

“And what comes after nine?”

“Ten.”

“And what comes after ten?”

“The Jack.”