Best Jokes

$12.00 won 2 votes

My cousin, a teacher, asked her young students, "Why should you never accept candy from strangers?"

One girl knew. "Because it might be past the sell-by date."

2 votes

CATEGORY Kid Jokes
posted by "stee" |
$50.00 won 2 votes

Teacher: "Where did Abraham Lincoln live?"

Little Johnny: "At the Gettysburg Address."

2 votes

posted by "Dan the Man 009" |
2 votes

When our second child was on the way, my wife and I attended a pre-birth class aimed at couples who had already had at least one child. The instructor raised the issue of breaking the news to the older child.

It went like this: "Some parents," she said, "tell the older child, 'We love you so much we decided to bring another child into this family.' But think about that. Ladies, what if your husband came home one day and said, 'Honey, I love you so much I decided to bring home another wife.'"

One of the women spoke up immediately. "Does she cook???"

2 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "wadejagz" |
$12.00 won 2 votes

A lawyer was talking to his teenage son about his future career. “Why do you want to be a doctor instead of a lawyer?” he asked. “What’s wrong with lawyers?”

“Well, Dad,” explained the boy, “I really want to help people. And when was the last time you heard anybody stand up in a crowd and shout frantically, ‘Is there a lawyer in the house?’”

2 votes

CATEGORY Lawyer Jokes
posted by "Dan the Man 009" |