Latest Jokes

One of my daughter's wedding presents was a toaster oven. Soon after the honeymoon, she and her husband tried it out. Almost immediately, smoke billowed out of the toaster.

"Get the owner's manual!" my daughter's husband shouted.

"I can't find it anywhere!" cried my daughter a short time later.

"Oops!" came a voice from the kitchen. "Well, the toast is fine, but the owner's manual's burned to a crisp."

I asked my friend Jim about our mutual friend Inge. She seemed down and depressed.

Jim answered, "She used to be the 'Bell of the Ball'. But nobody ever tolled her!"

Behind every successful man there is a strong, supportive woman... and a very surprised mother-in-law!

Charlie Brown, Snoopy, Dilbert, Dogbert, Garfield, Jon Arbuckle, and a whole lot of comic strip characters and their pets were on an airplane flying from Miami to Los Angeles.

In the middle of the flight, the flight attendant gave out food to everyone but Charlie Brown and Snoopy. They asked him why everyone else got some food and they didn't.

The flight attendant said, "Sorry, but we don't serve PEANUTS on this flight."