Latest Jokes

Two boys were talking and the one said to the other, “There is a easy way to get what you want.”

The other boy said, “How?” the boy replied, “Tell people you know their secret.”

The boy jumps up and runs to his dad, “I know your secret!” The dad replies, “Please don’t tell your mom here’s $10.”

The boy then runs to his mom, “I know your secret!” The mom said, “Please don’t tell your dad here’s $15.”

The boy then decides to try it on the mail man, “I know your secret!” The mail man opened his arms and said, “Come, give your dad a hug!”

The little boy was so excited because his mom told him he is getting a baby brother.

He repeated that to his teacher every day, when he came to school, “I’m getting a brother.”

One day his mom allowed him to feel the baby’s kicks in her belly. The next day he came to school and didn’t say anything to his teacher, so the teacher asked him, what happened to his brother.

He replied, “I think mommy ate him.”

One day Dan asks Bob, “So Bob what did you get for Christmas?”

Then Bob says to Dan, “Oh see that brand new red Ferrari outside?”

Dan says, “OOOOH WOW!!!”

Bob says, “Ya, I got the same exact color tie!”

A blonde and a redhead went to the bar after work for a drink, and sat on stools watching the 6 O’clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge, and the blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn’t jump.

Sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead $50. The redhead said,
“I can’t take this, you’re my friend.”

But the blonde insisted saying,
“No. A bet’s a bet.”

Then the redhead said
“Listen, I have to tell you that I saw this on the 5 O’clock news, so I can’t take your money.”

The blonde replied
“Well, so did I, but I didn’t think he would jump again!”