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A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he’d found a cat, but it was dead. “How do you know that the cat was dead?” the teacher asked.

“Because I pissed in its ear and it didn’t move,” answered the child innocently.

“You did WHAT?!?” the teacher exclaimed in surprise.

“You know,” explained the boy, “I leaned over and went ‘Pssst!’ and it didn’t move.”

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posted by "Lynda Richman" |
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A little girl asked her mother, “Can I go outside and play with the boys?”

Her mother replied, “No, you can’t play with the boys, they’re too rough.”

The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked, “If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?”

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posted by "Lynda Richman" |
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A teacher said to her student, "Billy, if both of your parents were born in 1967, how old are they now?"
After a few moments, Billy answered, "It depends."
"It depends on what?" she asked.
"It depends on whether you ask my father or my mother."

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posted by "Anonymous" |
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A little Henry sits at the dinner table, reaches into his plate, picks up a chicken leg, and starts to eat. His mother says, "Henry did you wash your hands?" Henry replies, "No! I don’t want my chicken to taste like soap mom!

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posted by "Anonymous" |