Latest Jokes

A couple is reading the paper, the wife says: This article on overpopulation of the world says that somewhere in the world there is a woman having a baby every four seconds! Her husband not to appear uninterested said; I think they ought to find that woman and stop her!

“Pull over the curb,” said the policeman. “You don’t have a taillight.”
The motorist stepped out, looked in back of the car, and stood quivering and speechless. “Oh, it’s not that bad,” said the policeman. The man mumbled, “It’s not the taillight I am worried about. Where are my wife and trailer?”

The bank robbers tied and gagged the employees in one room and the manager in his office. On their way out they noticed the manager was making desperate noises to catch their attention.

Moved by curiosity, one of the burglars loosened the gag and heard the man’s plead, “Please take the books too, I’m $5000 short!”

At the vending machine a man put a coin and watched powerlessly while the cup failed to appear. One nozzle sent coffee down the drain while another poured cream after it.
“Now that’s real automation! He exclaimed. “It even drinks for you!”