Latest Jokes

Mother had just finished waxing the floors when she heard her young son opening the front door. She shouted, “Be careful on that floor, Jimmy; it’s just been waxed.”
Jimmy, walking right in, replied, “Don’t worry, Mom, I’m wearing my cleats.”

"Simon, if I had eight apples in my right hand and ten apples in my left hand, what would I have?”

“Huge hands, sir.”

If quitters never win,
and winners never quit,
who made up the saying?
Quit while you're ahead!

A speeding driver was pulled over by a policeman. He asked the policeman, "Why was I pulled over when I wasn't the only one speeding."

The policeman replied, "Have you ever been fishing?"

The man then said, "Yes, I have."

"Well, have you ever caught all the fish?" asked the policeman.