little johnny jokes

Teacher: “Can anyone give me an example of a paradigm shift?”

Little Johnny: “It’s when you change a pair of dimes into four nickels.”

"Hey, Mom," asked Johnny "Can you give me twenty dollars?"

"Certainly not."

"If you do," he went on, "I'll tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop."

His mother's ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money. "Well, what did he say?"

"He said, 'Hey, Marie, please make sure you wash my socks tomorrow.' "

Teacher: Can anyone describe what a (shocking moment) is?

Little Johnny: It’s when you find out something that changes your world view.

Teacher: Yes, Johnny, that would definitely be an application of the term shocking moment. Can you give us an example of this in your personal life?

Little Johnny: When I was five my uncle Johnny came to visit from out of state and he’d cuss a lot. My mother said he’s just being a dummy and only does it because of my dad.

Teacher: OK, your uncle was trying to impress your dad inappropriately. I don’t understand what you found shocking about that?

Little Johnny: I was little and misunderstood my mom when she said my uncle was a dummy and my dad made him talk that way. It was really shocking when I found out my uncle could actually talk on his own and my dad wasn’t a ventriloquist.

Teacher: Since it's storm season, can anyone tell the class what a category five storm is?

Little Johnny: It’s when everyone hides in their room, including dad. It usually happens when Aunt Suzy comes to visit us and she starts talking to my mom about politics.