marriage jokes
Favorite this joke After we had lunch with another couple, the girls went shopping, and the guys opted to go sailing. Bad decision as a storm blew in while us guys were out on the water.
Making matters worse, the tide had gone out, grounding the boat. We had to climb overboard and shove it back into deep water.
As my friend stood there, ankles deep in muck, muscles straining against the weight of the boat, and rain pelting his face, he grinned broadly and with unmistakable sincerity said, "Sure beats shopping!"
A soldier in my National Guard platoon became concerned when the Army insisted that he sign up for direct deposit. "It’s not going to work for me," he said, panicked.
"Why not?" I asked.
"Because I use my Guard pay for spending money."
"So?"
"For the past ten years, I’ve been telling my wife that I serve for free!"
I’d noticed that my 60-year-old father seemed to be losing his hearing, so I mentioned it to my mother.
"Things haven’t changed that much," she said. "Only difference is, before, he didn’t listen. Now, he can’t."
Mr. and Mrs. Smith were always fighting. Then one morning as Mrs. Smith was driving around town, running some errands, her car was crashed into by a hit and run driver at a relatively low speed.
A police officer rushed up and asked her if she'd taken the car's number.
"I didn't need to," replied Mrs. Smith. "It was my husband in that car."
"Did you see him?" asked the officer.
"No," said Mrs. Smith, "but I'd recognize that laugh anywhere."
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