Best Jokes

Billy walks into class late. His teacher says, “Billy, do not walk into class late again."

The next day Billy crawls into class late once again. His teacher says, “Billy, I thought I told you not to come into class late?"

Billy responds, "No, you told me I couldn't walk into class late."

Guy: Excuse me, is your name Gillette?
Girl: No, Why?
Guy: Because you're the best a man can get!

Joan and her neighbor are talking about their daughters, Joan says, my daughter is at the university. She’s very bright, you know. Every time we get a letter from her we have to go to the dictionary.
Her neighbor says you are lucky every time we hear from our daughter we have to go to the bank.

“Guilty or not guilty of begging?’ asked the magistrate.
“Nearly guilty,” said the beggar.
“What do you mean, ‘nearly’ guilty? Asked the puzzled magistrate.
“Well, your honor, I asked the lady for twenty-five cents but I didn’t get it.”