Best Jokes

A teacher sees a lad entering the classroom – his hands were dirty.
She stopped him and said, “John, please wash your hands. My goodness, what would you say if I came into the room with hands like that?”

Smiling the boy replied, “I think I’d be too polite to mention it.”

Two husbands were discussing their married lives. Although happily married, they admitted that there were arguments sometimes. One said, “I’ve made one great discovery. I know how to always have the last word.”

“Wow!’ said the other. “How did you manage that?”

“It’s easy, my last words are always ‘Yes, Dear.’”

The older sister asks her younger brother, "What are you giving Mom and Dad for Christmas?"

Without missing a beat, the little brother replies, "A list of everything I want."

I called a motel and asked how much they charged for a room. The clerk told me that the rates depended on room size and number of people.

"Do you take children?" I asked.

"No, sir... nor checks!" replied the clerk. "Cash and credit only."