Best Jokes

Alex had a terrible day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one. On his way home, he stopped at the fishmonger and ordered four rainbow trout. He told the fishmonger, "Pick four large ones out and throw them at me, will you?"

"Why do you want me to throw them at you?'" Asked the salesman. "So that I am able to tell my wife, in all honesty, that I caught them." said Alex.

"Okay, but I suggest that you take the salmon."

"Why's that?"

"Because your wife came in earlier today and said that if you came by, I should tell you to take salmon. That's what she'd like for supper tonight." replied the fishmonger with a grin.

Did you see the Russell Crowe movie about the cannibal who ate his mother-in-law?

What? You don't remember that one?

It came out in 2000 and was titled Gladiator.

(glad he ate her).

Question: How many buckets does it takes to empty a bath?

Answer: None, just pull the cork.

Behold it is written in the book of February.

Chapter 14

Verse 1

And it shall come to pass that on val's day, excuses shall arise again: my battery died, my credit got finished, my DP refused to change, my boss selected me for the trip, traffic jams etc...

When thou seeth this signs, be calm, fearthou not, keep thy peace and know that verily verily... thou art not
thy boo's boo, thou art a side chick.

Verse 2

Even when you receive gifts, calls, or were taken out. Remember my dear daughter that all will end on the bed.

Verse 3

Blessed is the boy that bothers not himself 4 any girl 4 peace I will grant to him.

Verse 4

Hear ye hear ye For girls so love February 14 that they
gave their only begotten dignity in exchange for a date, but know ye that who so ever doesn't make that mistake shall not have the fear of 9 month assignment.