Latest Jokes

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Two high school buddies decided once and for all to prove who was the faster swimmer. They picked a large stream near their old high school, and the first one to swim to the other side would be declared the winner. Harvey, a friend of Bill, the so-called underdog, had a plan.

"For some reason," Harvey explained to Bill's other rooters, "Bill loves jokes, and when he hears or reads good, funny jokes, it gets his adrenaline going, and nothing can stop him."

Harvey then grabs a joke book and hands it to Bill before the whistle blew to start the race. "And they're off!" the whistle blower shouted.

Halfway across, picking the winner was practically a no-brainer. "Bill's going to win!" yelled one.

"He's actually chuckling and giggling, reading that joke book while swimming to the slope bordering the other side of the stream."

"What's he accomplishing by doing that?"

"He's laughing all the way to the bank!"

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CATEGORY Sport Jokes
posted by "Alan Valentine" |
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Bill: "Do you know what a satellite is?"

Phil: "Sure. It's what you put on your horse if you're going to ride him after dark."

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CATEGORY Puns
posted by "Dan the Man 009" |
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Teacher: If there are seven flies and I hit one with a ruler, how many are left?

Little Johnny: Just the squashed one.

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posted by "Dan the Man 009" |
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Some people have a hard time understanding how Noah could fit all those animals inside the ark...

But what amazes me is that Noah built the ark without a single power tool.

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posted by "Dan the Man 009" |