Latest Jokes

His team was 20 points behind and the coach was desperate, so he looked down the bench to his 330 pound tackle that was not his brightest player. The coach called him over and asked him, "If I put you in, can you play ruthless?"

"I sure can coach! Which one is ruthless?"

Oomga, a cannibal from the Congolese Amazon River Basin tribe went into the local restaurant for a bite to eat. "What's good today?" he asked the waiter.

"Today, we have an unfortunate wayward explorer from Norway. Also, we have three shipwreck survivors from the Spanish militia to pick from. But our special of the day is fabulous," the waiter continued. "She's a tarot card and crystal ball reader, one who specializes in a rather uncommon, vintage method of fortune telling."

"That settles it," Oomga replied. "I'll have the rare medium, well-done."

Why did the home crowd scream with delight when their favorite batter got three strikes?

He just happened to be bowling at the time.

An older couple is watching TV and the man kept changing the channel by mistake. His wife said, "Honey, you need to spend less time on social media. You do know TV doesn’t have a like button right?"