Latest Jokes

There was a kid who wouldn't learn the letters of the alphabet, so his teacher said 'go home, and learn the letters!' He went home and asked his sister
"What's the first letter?"
She said "Shut up!"
Then he asked "what's the second letter?"
She was singing along with the radio, so she said "Yeah, yeah, yeah!"
Then he went to see his dad, who was watching football, and said "What's the third letter?"
His dad said "Go! Go! Go!"
"What's the fourth letter?"
"64! 64! 64!" Then he went to see his brother, who was watching TV, and said "What's the sixth letter?"
His brother ignored him while watching TV and said "na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na BATMAN!"

The next day the teacher said. "Okay, what's the first letter?"
"Shut up!"
"Are you trying to get in trouble?"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah!"
"Do you want to go to the principal's office?"
"Go! Go! Go!"
"How many spankings do you want?
"64! 64! 64!"
"Who do you think you are?"
"na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na BATMAN!"

A visitor comes into a Maryborough pub with a tame crocodile at his heels and ordered a drink. The locals looked at the crocodile and it suddenly went up to someone's hat, which was sitting on a chair, and chewed it to shreds.
The hat's owner shouted at the visitor, "Hey look at what your crocodile has done to my hat."
The visitor replied, "That's too bad!" The hat owner got angry and said, "I don't like your attitude!"
The visitor replied, "It's not my (h)at (h)e chewed - it's your hat he chewed!"

MAN: I Have Facebook, BBM, KIK, Imo, Twitter, Google Plus, Yahoo, Tumblr, Msn, Skype, Snapchat, Instagram and G-Talk
FRIEND: Buddy, do you have a life?
AKPOS: OMG! No I don't! Send me the link to download it.

An Atheist, a vegan and a CrossFitter walk into a bar. How do you know?

They'll tell you.