Latest Jokes

It was only her second date with a diehard baseball fan, and Sally was a little nervous. It was her fault they arrived at the ballpark a full hour after the game had started. Taking her seat, Sally glanced up at the scoreboard. It was a tight pitcher’s battle, bottom of the fifth, 0-0. “Look, John,” she exclaimed with relief, “we haven’t missed a thing.”

It was only her second date with a diehard baseball fan, and Sally was a little nervous. It was her fault they arrived at the ballpark a full hour after the game had started. Taking her seat, Sally glanced up at the scoreboard. It was a tight pitcher’s battle, bottom of the fifth, 0-0. “Look, John,” she exclaimed with relief, “we haven’t missed a thing.”

A tired traveler decided to find a hotel for the night. He stumbled to the front desk and said to the clerk, “Pardon me, I’m exhausted, I’ve been driving for fourteen hours, I’m hungry, and I have a headache. Can you just tell me what room I’m in?”
“Certainly, sir,” the helpful clerk replied. “You are in the lobby.”

After successfully getting their big line items approved in the congressional spending package, two lobbyists were celebrating at a Washington restaurant.
“You know,” mused one, “it’s a crying, shame our grandchildren and great-grandchildren haven’t been born yet so they can see the terrific things the government‘s doing with their money.