A member of our church choir arrives every Sunday morning with her seven children in tow, all a bit rumpled but never the less on time.
Scarcely able to get my one child ready, I asked her how she managed her brood so efficiently.
"Easy," she replied with a smile. "I dress them the night before."
The bride came down the aisle and when she reached the altar, the groom was standing there with his golf bag and clubs at his side.
She said, "What are your golf clubs doing here?"
He looked her right in the eye and said, "This isn't going to take all day, is it?"
My neighbour banged on the wall at 430am this morning!
Can you believe it. Lucky I was still awake listening to music.
They banged and shouted, "Can we have a little respect please?"
I shouted back, "I'm not a big Aretha Franklin fan but this one’s for you!"