Latest Jokes

Man (to his boss): "Can we talk? I have a problem."

Boss: "Problem? No such thing, we call it an opportunity!"

Man: "Ok then, I have a serious drinking opportunity."

My boss calls me "the computer"...

Nothing to do with intelligence, I go to sleep if left unattended for 15 minutes.

Captain Hook, Captain Crunch, and Captain America walk into a bar. Hook says, "Ahoy mates, I'll buy the first round. Just let me go to the bathroom real quick."

The others wait and when Hook comes back Captain America asks, "Hey Hook, how bout those drinks?"

Hook yells, "Shove it up yer stars and stripes, ya flag waving boy scout!"

America turns to Crunch, "Why's he suddenly so irate?"

Crunch says, "Well, that's what happens when you take the P out of a pirate."

What do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common?

They're both Paris-sites!