Past Winners

5/10/2019 To 5/17/2019
$10.00 won 5 votes

A golfer was enduring the most miserable round. Every shot he tried seemed to end in disaster. He and his caddie had trailed in and out of woodland, deep rough, a lake and countless sand traps. On the seventeenth hole he was left with a shot of 180 yards to the green.

“Do you think I can get there with a five-iron?” he asked his caddie.

The caddie sighed, “Eventually.”

5 votes

CATEGORY Golf Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "D-Gellybean" |
5/10/2019 To 5/17/2019
$9.00 won 4 votes

"Look at this mess!" roared an angry customer at a local cafe, pointing to his squashed doughnut.

"It's just as you ordered it, sir," the waitress replied meekly.

"What do you mean?" barked the customer.

"You told me to bring you coffee and a doughnut and step on it."

4 votes

CATEGORY Food Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "Retired Terp" |
5/10/2019 To 5/17/2019
$8.00 won 3 votes
 

What does the world’s top dentist get?

A little plaque.

3 votes

CATEGORY Puns
Joke Won 7th Place won $8.00
posted by "pinkgalaxy3" |
5/10/2019 To 5/17/2019
$7.00 won 3 votes

A young man is reported to have approached the renowned composer Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart (one of the great musical prodigies of all time), and asked, "Herr Mozart, I have the ambition to write symphonies and perhaps you can advise me how to get started."

Mozart said, "The best advice I can give you is to wait until you are older and more experienced, and try your hand at less ambitious pieces to begin with."

The young man looked astonished. "But, Herr Mozart, you yourself wrote symphonies when you were considerably younger than I."

"Ah," said Mozart, "but I did so without asking advice."

3 votes

CATEGORY Musician Jokes
Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "wadejagz" |