To get my cousin to write to her even once, my aunt resorted to sending him a check with this note: “Do not cash until you write me a thank you.”
A few weeks later, the check had cleared, yet no message had arrived. So she called him. “I told you not to cash the check until you’d written to thank me,” she complained.
“I didn’t cash the check,” he said. “I deposited it.”
We were eating at one of the trendier restaurants in town when my friend pointed to the menu and told the waitress, "I’ll have the #24."
"Uh, Jim," I whispered, "that’s the price, not the meal number."
"Oh," he said. "Then give me the #12."