It was close to the beginning of a local lecture series when the usher announced, "There are only two single seats available."
"But you wouldn't separate a daughter from her mother, would you?" politely ask the older of two women who were waiting to be seated.
"You're quite right, madam, I wouldn't," replied the usher. "I did that once and I've been regretting it every since."
Little Johnny was being shown the shape of the earth on a globe atlas by his mother. After pointing to all countries with unusual shapes, she asks: "Now Johnny, what shape is the world?"
Johnny, looking very wise and happy, said: "Daddy says it's in terrible shape."