Past Winners

10/27/2017 To 11/3/2017
$8.00 won 22 votes

My mother was away all weekend at a business conference. During a break, she decided to call home, collect.

My six-year-old brother picked up the phone and heard a stranger’s voice say, "We have a Marcia on the line. Will you accept the charges?"

Frantic, he dropped the receiver and came charging outside screaming, "Dad! They’ve got Mom! And they want money!"

22 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
Joke Won 7th Place won $8.00
posted by "stee" |
10/27/2017 To 11/3/2017
$7.00 won 19 votes

Pulling into my service station 45 minutes late one morning, I shouted to the customers, "I’ll turn the pumps on right away!"

What I didn’t know was that the night crew had left them on all night. By the time I got to the office, most of the cars had filled up and driven off. Only one customer stayed to pay.

My heart sank. Then the customer pulled a wad of cash from his pocket and handed it to me.

"We kept passing the money to the last guy," he said. "We figured you’d get here sooner or later."

19 votes

CATEGORY Money Jokes
Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "sravanthi" |
10/27/2017 To 11/3/2017
$6.00 won 4 votes
 

Jim was annoyed when his wife told him that a car had backed into her, damaging a fender, and that she hadn't gotten the license number. "What kind of car was he driving?" he asked.

"I don't know," she said. "I never can tell one car from another."

At that, Jim decided the time had come for a learning course, and for the next few days, whenever they were driving, he made her name each car they passed until he was satisfied that she could recognize every make.

It worked. About a week later she came in the house with a pleased expression on her face. "Darling," she said. "I hit a Buick!"

4 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "HENNE" |
10/27/2017 To 11/3/2017
$5.00 won 4 votes

One Sunday morning, a preacher tells his congregation that in order to prepare for next week’s sermon that they should read Obadiah 2:1-2:15.

Next week comes and the preacher asks the congregation if they read the required reading from the Bible. Suddenly there’s a murmur in the congregation. No one read it, but since they didn’t want to get into trouble, they all raised their hands.

The preacher then says, It is amazing that all of you read Obadiah 2:1-2:15, because there is only ONE chapter in Obadiah. Now, today's lesson is on honesty..."

4 votes

Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "D-Gellybean" |